13 and 14.

Sometimes time seems to fly lately. I haven't updated for 2 weeks but at the same time i'm now beginning to get anxious for this pregnancy to be over. Yes, i know, i'm not even half-way through yet, even so.

The anti-nausea meds i initially was prescribed have been working better and i was prescribed a different brand that works better, letting me eat daily. Yay! I am still down 15 lbs and maintaining that nicely which i'm happy about. You know the second trimester "boost of energy" and symptom relief everyone talks about? Lies all lies! Okay, so i do have less nausea, however the exhaustion has tripled if that is even possible. if i'm able to, i sleep the day away. So irresponsible, i know. But i only let myself do that if my homework and anything else i need to do is done. i am just so tired all the time.

Something else that is fairly new is that whenever i eat something (or drink also), my mouth gets terribly dry. So as has been typical this entire pregnancy so far, i'm drinking loads of water. Oh, and the headaches! How could i almost forget? i've had more migraines than i care to think about, and a bad headache nearly every single day. My doctor said i must be dehydrated, however, if you've read the above sentences, you know that i could not possibly be. So i don't know. Lots of round ligament stretching and baby movement at night. i often feel him/her just swim around, not necessarily only kicking. Oh, and the boob growth? I'm up to 2 cup sizes larger already. Sigh. Milk glands are kicking in and they're starting to feel alive again. i found some great support-sports bras that i've been living in. i don't need that sort of discomfort in addition for several more months at least.

Also: i never really have any specific cravings when i'm pregnant. Maybe one or two once during the entire 9 months. The first one i had here was Gulab Jamun - an Indian dessert. Then, once i had it, i have never wanted it again.

Yesterday i bought about 9 chocolate bars of various types. I'm not a 'sweets' person due to my obsession with skin quality and weight of course, but now it seems like my body is craving them.....

.

.

.

DOES THIS MEAN GIRL?????

12 whole weeks!

Bleh. My ob/gyn gave me a prescription for anti-nausea meds that doesn't really consistently work. If i don't eat we all know what happens and if i do eat, well, depends on the day and time and what the current situation is. Sometimes stays down, often does not. Sigh. No food, no energy, no desire to do anything except lay around. Good thing i only have 2 classes a week and so when i'm laying around i can do my homework and stuff which i really enjoy. i should get excellent grades. ( i hope)

Still have the horrible sensitivity to any and everything and the sense of smell of a pregnant bloodhound. ugh. Nothing totally new to update. I began feeling movement at 11 weeks and so every now and again i feel that little Zohan kick me and stretch and stuff. Usually in the evenings after a meal when i'm settled down. I'm also sleeping all the time still. When will the 2nd trimester energy boost begin? This is a late update, i'll be 13 weeks tomorrow.

Ok, 8, 9,10 and 11.

so i've been slacking during the last few weeks. School has kept me busy and car/life troubles. We had our next O.B. appt at 11 weeks. According to the dr's office i've lost 12 lbs. In reality it's been more like 16. (so far.) i can eat sometimes, but it isn't specific to any sort of food type or vegetarian or whatever. It's just whatever it is which makes it far more frustrating because there isn't one specific thing that i can carry around to help me be able to eat a meal. This extreme nausea started at just after 9 weeks. It hit me like a lightning bolt and will not give me peace. I've even vomited blood on occasion and have had more than 48 hour non-stop headaches which are just horrible. i am extremely temperature sensitive and have the nose of a pregnant blood-hound. (to the point where i don't want to ride the elevator with anyone becuase i can smell if they've showered or not yet that day. sigh.) At the appointment we could not hear the heartbeat which was not cool, considering i know my dates and i know how far along i am. Exactly.

Anyhow, i wasn't too stressed about it because i have been there before- boy have i! We had an ultrasound yesterday and this is what we saw:

One baby. Perfect heart. Heartbeat 148. - but was probably sleeping so i can't yet make a guess as to boy or girl, although of course we're leaning towards girl! Size and growth= normal. Us= happy parents!

Week 7!

Week 7
BP: 128/64
Wt: 175 lbs

Had first prenatal appointment today with Dr. H. Joe came along and was just about as nervous as could be the whole time. She did an internal exam and stated that I was no further along than I know I am. Duh. I am not entirely stupid about these things. They took blood and we spoke about my new severe symptoms: I.E. fainting cold out, itchiness and extreme thirst. She said it was probably all due to ‘new’ material that my previous pregnancies did not contain. They called me later with results from my paps- some minor infections that were cleared with meds.

I was exhausted and we slept most of the day afterwards. I have been having hints of nausea in the mornings and whenever I am around food. I detect the vegetarianism hitting soon. I have also been spotting mildly- but brownish-pink- and very light, some days. It happened first a couple days before the appointment, then afterwards- probably due to the internal exam.
Today it seems to have stopped. We shall see. I could never duplicate it, just with the first wipe and then nothing after that. I was treated for the infections with samples from Dr’s office.
Today is May 09th 2008, Friday. I feel like shit. I am having mild to uncomfortable cramping in my lower abdomen. No spotting. I am irritable and nauseated. I cannot think of anything good to eat and whenever I just eat something, it feels like it is going to come back up. I have had headaches every day in the afternoon for weeks now and I am exhausted and thirsty.

I cannot drink much more water because that is really most of what I have consumed today and it just is not sitting in my stomach well. Go figure. I have also been urinating like a racehorse the last week or so. Getting up five or more times during the night and constantly during the day. This is something that had never happened before during any of my pregnancies….again, different material = different symptoms. Going to have to get used to that.

Week 6!

Week 6;

Usually, when considering my other pregnancies- especially those I carried to full-term, I began my nausea between 6 and 7 weeks. The morning I turned 6 w 1d, I felt queasy- extremely, until I ate. Don’t remember if I mentioned this before but the reason I initially took pregnancy tests was due to the fact that I had fainted out cold twice. After the first day of queasiness, I decided it was my responsibility (see, other times I was responsible for another child or it was so new I didn’t know what I was doing, so I didn’t really eat.- especially when I didn’t feel like it.) to eat. So I’ve been eating. All the time, whenever I feel slightly dizzy, queasy, hungry or just empty-ish. And it’s worked. So far. No more fainting yet!

One day I was out doing errands and I pulled into a parking lot to go shopping and after I had parked, I swear I felt the car still moving forward. I was terrified I was going to hit the car in front of me, but obviously being parked, that wasn’t going to happen. I realized then that I needed to take responsibility to keep my blood sugar and potassium up enough to a level that I would not ever, ever faint while driving at the very least. At home it’s one thing, but out driving is incomprehensible. So, because Joe cannot drive me around, I have to be responsible enough myself to continue to do that. And I feel I have been. I’ve been good about carrying snacks around with me in my school bag and purse (once spring school was done, a few days ago).

Smells of course have been just killing me! I don’t ever remember being this smell-sensitive since I was pregnant with Kevin. I can tell whether or not Joe has smoked when he walks in the door. I can tell who is eating what in any restaurant, no matter how far they are pretty much. It takes a LOT of holding my breath and willing myself not to feel sick with what I smell.
Between that and the intense growing- Sarah measured me the other day. Note; she is a PA and has done pre-natal’s before and often. I measured at just over 18 weeks- at just barely 6 weeks, no less! She is about 5-6 ahead of me and she measured at appropriately her size for her dates. Also, we are both having our third child. (yes, I lost two inbetween the others but I think she’s had at least one loss, if not more. She denies it now but….) anyway, we should both be measuring at where we are right?? I certainly should not be measuring twice as big as her when she is twice as far as I am. And while, for the first time I’ve sort of been enjoying not having to lift stuff and be responsible for kitty litter and what have you, (Joe has been taking excellent care of me.- almost too good) I’m still concerned that something may be wrong. It certainly isn’t the first time I myself, or somebody else- like everyone else, has concluded that I’m having more than one.

There has been lots of negativity involved as well. Heather called me and said she ‘knew’ I was pregnant with Joe. She said it is a girl and that I would lose it at 7 months. What.the.fuck???????
Who says that to a pregnant woman??? Or any woman really?
Anyway, a lot of this stuff has been negative. Dreams included. Last night was the first night I had a positive dream about this pregnancy. I dreamt we had triplets. Two boys and and one girl. All fraternal. Boys had brown hair and looked like a baby Ice but slightly lighter. The girl had bright red hair and they all were gorgeous and perfect. I woke so happy. I guess Monday will tell….or not. It’s still really, really early. I’ll be one day short of 7.1 weeks on Monday.

Week 5

5 weeks came and went. No extreme nausea to speak of. Mostly just ate. Hungry all the time. Intense need for protein and salty/sour snacks. Can’t tell you how many times my tongue has been raw from eating those salt and vinegar chips (salted myself as well) and anything else similar that I could find. And then, I started growing. Almost immediately I could tell a difference. Not a week after I found out about the pregnancy, I had to wear maternity pants. And then those were too small. So I bought bigger and bigger.
And now, I can barely fit into those. I don’t know what’s going on. I know that I’m eating well and other than being absolutely horribly exhausted at all hours of the day, nothing super spectacular.

I think I’ve felt movement. Sometimes I’m absolutely sure. Usually after a meal or a sour drink (think juice), and I’m sitting or lying still, I’m almost positive I can feel stuff moving around. A lot. It isn’t just in one place and it isn’t gas. ( I went through that in the very beginning. HORRIBLY! - but it’s pretty much gone now, just other movements)
At about 5 ½ weeks we started telling people- Joe’s mother, best friend K., and etc. Everyone seems to be ecstatic and super excited and due to the fact that Joe has twins in his family history, as well as that I have grown so damn much in such a short time (yes, I am aware that I have been pregnant numerous times before and have had 2 live births so growth is expected earlier)…but this much??? Really? Shit. Sarah is about 5-6 weeks ahead of me and I am larger.

Who knows?

Surprise!!!!

Batch Three!

I found out on April 18, 2008 that I was pregnant again. This is the 5th pregnancy for me and I found out at about 4 weeks, 4 days. One faint line. Another, then another, then another. The first test I took was negative and so I continued taking them day after day after day and the second one and from then on was positive. Faint, very faint. So faint that after I had taken about 5 from the Dollar Tree, I bought one of those digital packs. Took about 5 seconds and then I received a “POSITIVE.”
Nice birthday present. I guess.

I was scared, nervous, obviously excited but concerned that this might affect the custody/divorce case that had just began. Joe was excited, but I think initially was more concerned and nervous himself. This will be his first. At this time, X had taken Ice and K. and most of my/our/the kids stuff and moved upstairs to the third floor. I was staying at Joe’s temporary place a few blocks away.
The initial reason I began taking pregnancy tests was because one day I was speaking to Sarah on the phone while pacing around the apartment during a study break. The next thing I knew, I was waking up on the floor on my face in a puddle of drool. After I came to some sense of what could have possibly happened (fainting), I called S. back and she said that mid-sentence I stopped talking and started moaning. She stayed on the line as long as she could calling my name but no response from me. After the phones hung up she thought maybe Joe had come home and we were making out or something. It never crossed her mind that I might be in a puddle on the floor. She said I had been out about 15 minutes when I called her back.

That scared the SHIT out of me. I had just moved out of my friend (ex?) Heather’s house and had experienced two of her seizures with her. Those were also killers. I had to realize she was seizing, hold her still and compress her, basically for minutes until she calmed down and came to. Also, with her, she had no recollection of any of it. The first time it happened while I was at her house, after I determined she was all right, I went out in the parking lot and just wept. It scared me so bad. So you can imagine what I felt when I realized that perhaps I’d had a seizure myself, or at the very least, just fainted out cold. (the previous pregnancy fainting I always have is brief, 30 seconds to a minute. I get about a 20 second warning before and then I black out. I can still hear (rather intensely actually) and I am aware of what is going on, but I cannot see. When I regain my vision shortly later, I am nauseated to death.

Not. This. Time!

The second time was after we had just come home from the bar where we told some of our friends that we were expecting. ( I was drinking juice thank you!)
When we got home, I decided to shower to get the smoke out of my hair. I had shampooed and was putting conditioner in my hair. That was the last thing I remember before I woke to Joe busting the bathroom door open and myself laying on the floor, naked, rinsed off and with my head through the wall. Joe YELLED at me. He was so scared and angry and couldn’t believe that I was okay. I apparently had gotten out (or fell out) of the shower, banged my head against the wall and broke it through before passing out on the floor. I don’t remember anything until he was yelling at me after taking the doorknob off and busting in. I flatly refused to go anywhere. Certainly not to the ER, and after some hours he calmed down and we went to bed. Now, I knew I was pregnant at that time but it still scared me to death. This has and had NEVER happened before aside from the first fainting spell.

(I’m not sure if this will ever be published or not because today I am only 6 weeks, 4 days and the first appointment is on Monday.) We probably will not even hear the heartbeat at the first appointment, although of course I hope we do. It’s still extremely early. This might end up being nothing more than a molar pregnancy or worse. It’s too early to know yet. Thing is, it’s different this time. Drastically! I had begun cramping heavily in the beginning and almost thought I saw extremely light spotting. But nothing that I could actually prove. I went to the emergency room because of this and they did blood work- HCG was 65. They did a regular ultrasound and then a trans-vaginal U/S and neither showed anything much except a small ovarian cyst. They did a pelvic and assured me that i appeared to be pregnant, then sent me home. Lovely.